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HOW TO DEAL PEOPLE WHEN THEY ARE UPSET.
by Chennai based K.B.Gopalakrishnan 18th MAY,2007 12:14 PM
Many people get upset because some one is upset about them. Whole day and night gets spoiled because of this.
Redefine the reaction- some one may be upset for some thing else and yet they can take it on you. Basically many people do not have courage and guts to fight at the place where they get hurt. They take it on their wife and children. One man told his friend that it is easy to shout at his wife as she does not react very quickly. People escape in this way very fastly.
May be the other person does not have knack and skill to express their need in a positive and peaceful manner. Many people shout because they believe that truth needs to be told in loud voice. Some people suppress so much so they do not know why they are upset.
Give 10% leverage- for every 10 minutes conservation you have with others, there will be differences for 2 minutes. Out of ten interactions two will not be ok. Law of average does not favor perfect interaction.
Think them as soul- looking people as soul and as personality will release ego and personality definition.
Think them as a hurt child or mad people or tormented soul. If we look people as intelligent and genius and wanting to hurt us will make us feel more bad, helpless and tormented. Redefine their level of emotional intelligence. Some people become worse with age and time.
God appointed teacher- people who accuse are god appointed teachers to you to develop patience, kindness and non retaliation.
Think your bad karma level is coming down- when some one shouts at you and you do not retaliate your bad karma level is coming down. It will help you to become peaceful.
Think of energy loss, tiredness and mental torture guilt one will experience after fighting. You will become less interested in fighting.
Think of positive ways of fulfilling the desire- do not keep it inside. Ask others and if the other person shouts, wait. Then find ways to get the desire fulfilled.
When ever some hurt you allow the lord to punish them than u taking the role of prosecutor.
Pray god for help to deal with the situations.
Think of good things they have done.
Think of ways to give up your habits to make life more peaceful.
Bless the other person- for example my mother was upset. I blessed her after meditation she started telling that she wanted to pray. I blessed my brother and his habits changed. The best way to change the other people is to pray for them and bless them. this is the fastest and surest ways.
Stop polarizing – I know this will be difficult for women. Many women in the course of conversation talk always opposite of their spouse. Any things their hubby says, they will take anti view. such ways will create lot of problems. Learn to simply say yes for 15- 20 times every time you have the conversation. One will see the relationship becoming positive.
Learn to distinguish between the reaction and need- some one may want Rs.100. instead when you give Rs 50 they will reject it. Then you realize that the person wants more money . They are shy to ask.
Appreciate yourself every time when you react positively to people even when they react negatively. I use this techniques and it work wonder. Every time some one talks irritatingly and i have reacted positively I tell myself " good gopal excellent wonderful. It is a satisfaction of subtle victory."
Learn to recover using affirmation, visulisation and breathing techniques to calm down the mind. Learn to pull the aura and cut the cords. Then it will be easier for you to deattach yourself from the situation.
See where you are doing same behavior of hurting people unconsciously. You will see that what you give comes back to you in different way. I know a person who got hurt with his friends reaction. When checked he accepted that he had been hurting his wife for last three - four days. Instant karma. What you do to others god does it to you.
Finally tell the person if you are hurt in a positive manner. This will solve many problems than keeping it boiling it inside.
May Every One Read The Articles Use These Methods And May I Also Learn To Perfect The Satvic Love.
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